Caleb says she’s so amazing, more like a goddess than a girl. He hasn’t been seeing her long and none of us have met her yet, so we accuse him of making her up.
He says she’s as real as anyone, only she smells like French perfume, sings like Adele, has the brains of Einstein, and the body of a centerfold.
Someone says she can probably fly.
–Oh, she can, she really can, Caleb says.
We play another hand. The guy to my left wins with a royal flush. He shuffles the cards and wants to know when this girl’s going to show.
–Any minute now, Caleb says. She’s off work at ten.
Minutes come and minutes go and we’re all sick of cards. We put on a movie, an old one from the Fifties with a fake dinosaur that breathes fire and burns down Tokyo. The guy who won the pot takes off, so does my roommate who has to be up at six. That leaves me and Caleb staring at this stupid movie, trying to stay awake, waiting for this girl.
Finally, the back door opens and Caleb’s on his feet, heading into the kitchen at warp speed. There are voices and laughter, so I go, too. This girl is the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. Tall, wide, pale milky skin but not in a sexy way, in a gross, sour kind of way, and flaming red hair that on another girl would be cute but on this girl makes her look like a clown…
